A common struggle for many new coaches or those thinking about serving people in some type of coaching role is that they are afraid they may not know what to say to a client. Spoiler Alert…that will happen to all of us at some point. In this week’s episode, I am helping you feel confident in how you can respond if that situation comes up.
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I was scared AF…
A common struggle for many new coaches or those thinking about serving people in some type of coaching role is that they may have a moment where they may not know what to say.
That thought drives a feeling of fear or doubt.
And when we take action from a place of fear or doubt it often leads to inaction–we don’t look for clients, therefore we don’t get any and then we don’t serve our passion nor make a profit.
Today our focus is to talk about what to do if you didn’t actually know what to say.
Leads you to NOT take action or not even show up.
It’s a thought error.
First off–every coach has been here, in a place where your mind is working hard to be ahead of your client and have the best response, and then…it happened. Your mind went blank, you could feel the anxious energy in your body, sweaty palms, and your heart racing and you have no idea what to say.
Coaching doesn’t go in perfect order….
Sweaty palms and heart racing
I have been there. And I survived!!! LOL, and that moment made me better.
First: I would like to play this out with the worst-case scenario. What if you were on a call and your client was talking and you legit had no idea what to do? Worst case is that you would freeze, not know and then have to change subjects or amidst the conversation, you lose track of thought and redirect.
I want to talk first about the importance of the thoughts that lead to this moment…the origin if you will or not knowing what to say.
- I have to know it all.
- I have to have it all figured out.
- I have to be perfect.
- What if I do it or say it wrong?
These thoughts are internal thought errors already leading to doubt.
More importantly, masterful coaching comes from making the coaching about the client and not you. When you aren’t actually making coaching about the client then you are living in your head. You actually aren’t even coaching. You are thinking. If you are focused on your own thinking, you aren’t curious about your client and you are missing the most perfect opportunities to coach them. Coaching is about being curious and asking the RIGHT QUESTIONS. In fact, it might take lots of questions to get there, as well as time and that’s okay.
If you didn’t really know what to say or have an answer let’s talk about options:
- Don’t make stuff up.
- Be transparent. Let’s look for the answer together.
- Thank you for all of that. I’d love to ask a few more questions to gain more clarity. Would that be alright?
- I don’t have an answer for you right now. Let me do some research and circle back. You could provide an additional session or hop on a quick phone call to follow up.
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